Yep, you read that right. Every single Beatles song – album tracks and singles included. I’m an idiot.
There are 213 tracks by my count, so I’d better get on with it! Remember – this is just my opinion, and it’s definitely wrong. I’ll be posting this list in two segments (213-107, then 106-1 separately) so be on the look out for that!
You can check out some of my related blog posts below:
213 – Revolution 9
I’m not going to go in-depth for every song on this list (otherwise we’d be here for days), but “Revolution 9” deserves a thorough roasting.
It’s eight minutes of hot garbage, with Lennon going way too far down the experimental road. It very nearly ruins the entire “White Album” listening experience, and I don’t think I’ve ever stomached the full thing in one sitting. Utterly abysmal.
212 – Chains
The most cliché early Beatles song imaginable. It was close to being in “Terrible”, but thankfully it’s short.
211 – Dig It
A pointless interlude track.
210 – Matchbox
The worst Beatles single, by far.
209 – Little Child
A complete misfire.
208 – Maggie Mae
Another pointless filler song on “Let It Be” to get the album up to the required track number.
207 – Not A Second Time
Another misfire from “With The Beatles” – it’s tracks like these that make that album such a snooze.
206 – Wild Honey Pie
Funny on a good day, insufferable on others.
205 – Hold Me Tight
Oh look, another “With The Beatles” bombshell to stink up the gaff.
204 – Don’t Pass Me By
Sorry, Ringo, but your only contribution to “The White Album” was pants.
203 – Her Majesty
A neat little bonus track at the end of “Abbey Road”, but it has no substance.
202 – A Taste Of Honey
More like “A Taste Of Mediocrity”.
201 – P.S. I Love You
One of the worst openings to any song I’ve ever heard, but the choruses are alright.
200 – Honey Don’t
At least you tried, Ringo.
199 – Everybody’s Trying To Be My Baby
A lucklustre Harrison cover to end “Beatles For Sale”.
198 – Baby’s In Black
Miserable from start to finish.
197 – Act Naturally
Ringo’s covers are never ground-breaking, but some of them really do my head in.
196 – Devil In Her Heart
Similar to other stinkers on “With The Beatles”, but “Devil In Her Heart” has a slight mellow appeal going for it.
195 – Boys
One of Ringo’s most energetic covers, so it’s a shame the song itself doesn’t really have any substance.
194 – I Call Your Name
What’s with the cowbell?
193 – I Wanna Be Your Man
The Beatles wrote this in a few minutes for their buddies The Rolling Stones, and I think it shows.
192 – Another Girl
191 – The Continuing Story Of Bungalow Bill
Sometimes Lennon can get real weird with it. Not a very interesting narrative, either.
190 – I’ll Cry Instead
Okay, I’ll join you but I’ll cry of boredom instead.
189 – Slow Down
Why did they cover this of all things?
188 – When I Get Home
Some really weak vocal harmonies throughout.
187 – Mr Moonlight
The most mid-tier, forgettable Beatles melody ever.
186 – Good Day Sunshine
The worst song on “Revolver”, and it’s not even close.
185 – Dizzy Miss Lizzy
I feel less dizzy and more queasy, to be honest.
184 – Piggies
Not a very subtle metaphor from Harrison. The pig sounds are too weird for me.
183 – I Should Have Known Better
Yeah, I should’ve known better than to listen to this.
182 – Please Mister Postman
Please, Mister Postman, turn this boring cover off!
181 – Words Of Love
Nowhere near the best Beatles song talking about the power of the word “love”.
180 – Roll Over Beethoven
Beethoven would be rolling over in his grave if he heard this.
179 – Rock And Roll Music
I mean, I guess this counts as rock and roll music? Barely?
178 – Kansas City / Hey-Hey-Hey-Hey
Two boring covers, but at least McCartney puts his back into it. And it’s two songs for the price of one!
177 – The Fool On The Hill
Okay, I should probably explain my reasoning a bit more for “The Fool On The Hill” as everyone else would definitely rank it higher.
I like the whimsical story, but the flute instrumentals kill the track completely for me. I’d rather listen to the 176 songs above than this again.
176 – Mean Mr Mustard
The worst of the Abbey Road medley, but I guess it has a cool swing to it.
175 – Sun King
Another filler song for the medley, with some borderline creepy vocals from Lennon.
174 – Why Don’t We Do It In The Road?
I quite like how off-beat and unserious this is, but I’d be doing the other songs below it a disservice if I ranked “Why Don’t We Do It In The Road?” any higher.
173 – All Together Now
This feels like a complete cop-out, and a worse version of “Yellow Submarine”.
172 – Thank You Girl
171 – Long Tall Sally
One of the better Beatles covers.
170 – Love You To
Harrison’s first attempt at an Indian-infused sound isn’t great, but it’s a solid start.
169 – Tell Me Why
Kinda soppy, but that’s to be expected from their debut album.
168 – Baby It’s You
Almost identical to the previous song.
167 – You Know My Name (Look Up The Number)
The weirdest song in the Beatles discography. Some parts of it are really good, but then the baby noises ruin it.
166 – Love Me Do
Blasphemy! The first ever Beatles hit so low on my list! Well, I hate to burst your bubble, but “Love Me Do” is very one-note as songs go.
165 – You Really Got A Hold On Me
Thing song never quite got a hold on me.
164 – You Like Me Too Much
I probably don’t like this song enough.
163 – Revolution 1
A far inferior version of the original classic, but at least it’s better than number nine.
162 – I Don’t Want To Spoil The Party
These kind of low-energy Beatles songs tend to put me to sleep.
161 – The Night Before
160 – I Need You
Some unique guitar sounds, but that’s about it.
159 – What Goes On
A fun Ringo song, but it pales in comparison to the rest of “Rubber Soul”.
158 – I’ll Get You
Sounds a little under-produced, but the performance is fun.
157 – Things We Said Today
A sort of precursor to “I’ll Be Back”, but this one is far less interesting.
156 – I’m Down
At least McCartney’s having the time of his life with it.
155 – Honey Pie
I’m all for some pleasant McCartney melodies, but “Honey Pie” sounds too tacky.
154 – Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite
Controversial opinion time – I could never get into this track. The worst song off Sgt. Peppers.
153 – Maxwell’s Silver Hammer
Abbey Road is my favourite album of all time, but oh boy does “Maxwell’s Silver Hammer” make me question my life decisions from time to time.
152 – Polythene Pam
One of the Abbey Road medley fillers, but Ringo’s drumming is on point.
151 – Only A Northern Song
This used to be one of my underrated favourites, but it’s a little too chaotic for my tastes.
150 – Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da
Okay, hopefully I can be a little more positive about the songs from now on!
This song can get a little graining and repetitive at times, but it’s nothing if not infectious.
149 – I’m A Loser
I hate how down-beat Lennon was at times, but the song itself is decent.
148 – Tell Me What You See
Solid groove with some fun keyboard parts.
147 – This Boy
A vocal harmony-centric song, “This Boy” has a great Lennon moment or two but that’s where the magic runs out.
146 – She’s A Woman
I’ve always had a soft spot for this one.
145 – What You’re Doing
Not the most interesting song on paper, but Ringo’s drumming makes it stand out.
144 – No Reply
Another Lennon downer, and I can feel the emotions behind the lyrics.
143 – Bad Boy
My guilty pleasure song, the performance is too energetic for me to put it down.
142 – Misery
The second song on the Beatles first album, and it’s decent.
141 – Within You, Without You
The second track in the Harrison Indian trilogy, and it’s much better than “Love You To”
140 – Any Time At All
Love the call and response.
139 – Blue Jay Way
I’ve complained about weird songs before, but “Blue Jay Way” is grounded enough where I can appreciate the unsettling tone it’s going for.
138 – Good Morning Good Morning
Not a stand-out song from Sgt. Peppers, but I love the horn arrangement and animal noises.
137 – Yer Blues
As downer of a song as you can get, I’m surprised The Beatles didn’t hold an intervention for Lennon after he wrote this suicidal track.
136 – Eight Days A Week
Lennon and McCartney weren’t happy with how this lead single turned out, but I think it has a certain charm.
135 – Ask Me Why
I love how the guitar part has a swing to it.
134 – I’m So Tired
Goodness me, Lennon could be such a miserable git sometimes.
133 – One After 909
Not as polished as some of the other rockers on “Let It Be”, but that’s what makes it unique.
132 – I’ll Follow The Sun
A quite lovely track from “Beatles For Sale”.
131 – If I Needed Someone
Some of the harmonies are questionable, but the rest is good.
130 – Mother Nature’s Son
A bit of an odd song on “The While Album”, but I can appreciate it.
129 – I’m Happy Just To Dance With You
A charming Harrison track.
128 – Don’t Bother Me
A less charming Harrison track. I dig it.
127 – Anna (Go To Him)
Sounds more like a song from Grease than a Beatles song, but oh well.
126 – From Me To You
An early Beatles hit, “From Me To You” is a little overrated but still fine.
125 – It Won’t Be Long
An explosive start to “With The Beatles”.
124 – You Can’t Do That
A great song held back by some intrusive cowbell at points.
123 – Yes It Is
It can sound pretty dreary in places, but the vocal harmonies are nice.
122 – Run For Your Life
Sure, the lyrics are a little questionable, but “Run For Your Life” is an energetic way to end “Rubber Soul”.
121 – You’re Going To Lose That Girl
It was never going to be a hit, but I like the melody.
120 – You’ve Got To Hide Your Love Away
This, on the other hand, could have made a good hit in a parallel universe.
119 – Martha My Dear
The rest of the band loathed this song, but I can’t really see why? Sure, it has the same kind of tackiness as “Honey Pie”, but this is far superior in every way.
118 – You Won’t See Me
A great song cataloguing a tumultuous time in McCartney’s life.
117 – Wait
Quite an underrated bop from “Rubber Soul”.
116 – Do You Want To Know A Secret?
It doesn’t get more charming than this.
115 – I’m Looking Through You
A really great song that would have easily made the top 100 if not for the graining organ sound in my right ear.
114 – Rocky Raccoon
I’ve grown to appreciate the storytelling of this song a lot more over the years.
113 – I Will
A delightful little track.
112 – Doctor Robert
Not a particularly stand-out song, but fairly underrated in the grand scheme of things.
111 – Fixing A Hole
Sgt. Peppers is full of lyrically interesting songs, and “Fixing A Hole” is no exception.
110 – Cry Baby Cry
The first two-thirds of the Lennon stuff is pretty good, and the McCartney outro adds a surreal aspect to it all that I love.
109 – Flying
A purely instrumental track, and a great addition to “Magical Mystery Tour”.
108 – Good Night
The saving grace at the end of “The White Album”. This song is overly hated.
107 – The Word
A simple premise, and yet it works well.
Alright, that’s the first half of the list done! Once I’ve finished the second half of the list, I’ll link it below.
In the meantime, you can check out some of my latest blog posts below:
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